14 November 2007: BIAP via QWest

We made it back to Camp Liberty. After enduring Dr. Phil and the romance novels, we boarded a C130 at around 0030. It had one stop but was eventually flying to BIAP. This flight turned out to be one of the most uncomfortable I've endured. C130's are definitely not luxury aircraft. They don't even rate coach. Passengers sit on cargo net seats that fold down from the sides of the cargo hold. If your back is leaning against a bulkhead, strut, or support then so be it. When there aren't many passengers it's easy to at least stretch out to mitigate the discomfort. The worst flight is when you are crammed in with both passengers and cargo. I'm getting somewhere with this.

Leg 1: Mosul to FOB QWest

As we boarded the aircraft it became obvious that trouble lay ahead. Only the front third of the cargo hold was configured for passengers. This was a sure sign we'd be picking up bulky cargo on the next stop. In the meantime, we all crammed into the forward area. The AF flight crew were discouragingly rude (unusual). They were barking at us like we were children. I was shoved into a seat between two very large Joes. As I struggled with the seat belts I realized (to my dismay) that my seat had two "female" buckles - meaning I couldn't latch up. There was nowhere else to sit so I just prayed nothing would happen. My knees were shoved against the person across from me. Despite the fact that it was hovering around 50 outside, the crew had on the AC. Wouldn't you know it? Fucking thing was blowing directly down on me and freezing my ass off. This was the condition for the fifteen minute flight to QWest.

Layover in QWest

Once the plane stopped and the ramp went down the flight crew asked for the QWest passengers to exit the aircraft. About two thirds of the people onboard got up and left. I sighed deeply and jumped over to what I thought would be a more comfortable seat. That's when another flurry of activity commenced. First, a whole group of new passengers boarded and squeezed us all forward. Next, some loose luggage (yes, I mean suitcases) belonging to one of the civilian interpreters started getting passed forward so it would be clear of the cargo area. Someone tried to hurl the biggest suitcase forward but instead it landed right in my lap. With a dull thud I felt the pain instantly in my kneecap. One of the rollers from this very heavy suitcase had dug deeply into my knee. It hurt so much that it stunned me momentarily. Once I recovered I gave the culprit a very nasty eye. I could read his lips over the noise of the engines. He said, "sorry, sir!"

Meanwhile the flight crew was busy directing the traffic of forklifts. First they removed the cargo pallets already onboard. Then came the bulky cargo to be loaded. It was a twenty foot container. It took them forever to line up the lift so the container would roll straight onto the plane. Even then it seemed as though it wouldn't fit. One of the crew was obviously new and attempting to learn how to lock and unlock the cargo position latches. He kept locking up the wrong ones. The end result was that it took almost 45 minutes to place the container on the aircraft. Normally, loading something like that would only take around 20. We were on the ground in QWest for well over an hour. We finally took off around 0230. My knee was throbbing, my new seat was against a bulkhead that vibrated with the engines, and the AC was still blowing right on me.

Leg 2: QWest to BIAP

This is about an hour flight. Shit it seemed a lot longer. I couldn't get comfortable or warm. I watched some of my team that sat across from me with great envy. They seemed to be sleeping so comfortably. I wanted to drop them for push-ups (not really). One of my team members sat adjacent to the container. I laughed when I saw him size up the container and write "NO GO" in chalk on the front. Even on the C130 my team is on the job. About 0345, mercifully, we landed. I staggered off the plane with a slight limp. I wanted to kiss the tarmac. Our flight from hell was over. We were back at BIAP.

I told my team that I didn't want to see them the rest of the day or evening. By 0430 I was in my bed back at my Camp Liberty hooch. I slept until almost 1000. What did I do the rest of the day? Absolutely nothing. I enjoyed every minute of it too.