It's never happened to me before my entire life. It happened today. It was already weak and cracking. I joked and said it was due to me reaching puberty. Then, right in the middle of me giving the replacements a briefing, it was gone. My voice simply vanished. One of the new Sergeants reached in her pocket and produced some peppermints. She handed me one and said, "Try this sir. These are the good kind. I got them at Cracker Barrel." I gratefully took it and shoved it in my mouth. The candy had just enough restorative power to allow me to finish the training brief. A few minutes later my voice took leave for the rest of the day. I followed shortly after. Whatever I picked up from that shitty CHU at Warhorse is gripping more tightly on me with every passing minute. I didn't have any more presentations to give the replacements. I handed the training over to one of my NCO's.
It really sucks to be feeling so poorly. This is a feeling made more acute by the fact that I have a new team hanging on every word I say. I never get sick. Ask any of my friends. Yet, here I am within days of leaving and struggling with the bug. On my way back to the hooch I made a stop at the chow hall. I was glad I did. A nature call gave me an opportunity to see some port-o-jon wisdom. Actually, most of it was so foul and raunchy that I won't even quote it here. I mean, it was that bad. However, there was a Joe who decided to provide a plausible "exit strategy" with justification. State Department Joe wrote:
"Let's just make Iraq a state. That way Mississippi won't be the worst one of all."
I've been to Mississippi. SD Joe may be onto something here. My question is this - would Iraqi University be in the Southeastern Conference? That would keep Vanderbilt from being the annual football goat (at least for a few years).
After supper I cruised back to the hooch and crashed hard. It was a fitful sleep though. A nagging cough and a sore throat from hell kept waking me back up.
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